Scratch-Off’s Magical Mystery Tour

Preamble:

Ahhh, it’s been too long since YHC has taken the helm at the Gladiator. Okay, it’s been like a month. The morning started with 3 panicked wake-ups thinking that I’d fartsacked only to realize that it was only 2:17am. They say you get over that once you’re done with school, but like most strawmen, “they” are idiots. Also, I hope I never mature to the point where I can say “fartsack” with a straight face.

YHC was feeling a little nostalgic since I’m coming up on my 2-year F3 anniversary. I can’t really remember when that is, so maybe Blackbox can help figure out when he dragged me out the first time. Blackbox?

Anywell, we went on a lovely little trip around the park, hitting some of my favorite spots. It was awesome. And definitely planned well ahead of time.

Warm-O-Rama:

Disclaimer: the fact that I’m not a professional surprised literally no one…

The PAX, fully disclaimed, moseyed to warmup Station 1 along our Magical Mystery Tour: The Splashpad Parking Lot (Splashpad Stable? Trying too hard?)

We carefully navigated around a pestiferously parked people-mover, circled up, and went through the following:

• SSH
• Windmills
• Hillbillies
• Moroccan Night Clubs
• 5 Burpees OYO

The Thang:

Then, we moseyed to Station #2. The Coupon K’noll. The PAX were instructed to grab a lifting coupon and line up on the road. We then conducted a 5 minute circuit alternating between:

• 20 Curls
• Run to the first light post on the left
• 10 thrusters
• Run to the first light post on the left

Editors note: the PAX were a little confused on how to turn around at the light post. The coupons were carefully clustered back in the drainage ditch, and we moseyed up the hill one more time.

On the way to Station #3: Holcomb’s Hideout, YHC remembered why a Q should always remind the PAX about the need for headlamps the night before the beatdown. Not in the parking lot at 5:26. See disclaimer for more details. Anywell, we took a quick mosey break for some more Burpees OYO and American Hammers

Moseying on to Station #4: The Library Loop. The PAX were split into pairs(ish) for another timed circuit. Who knows how long this one went, honestly. One partner ran a loop while the other one repped out the following:

• Merkins
• Monkey Humpers
• Gas Pumpers
• Merkins

Annnnd then we were down a better-lit road to Station #5: Murph’s Morning Call for you guessed it. Morning Call.

Moseying back in ERP, YHC consulted with Brownie on what our final station was going to be. He got real nervous about how the PAX would respond to wind sprints on the field, so we diverted to Station 6: Precipitation Pavilion where we ran through some partner-alternating step-ups and ab work. Fittingly, Speedo really wanted to do flutter kicks because swim season.

And that’s it! We moseyed back to the flag for Mary, where a delirious bunch of grown men couldn’t keep it together during some pickle pounders. Lordy, I love this group.

COT:

Prayers for Curtis for a quick and full recovery.

CPR Training.

Naked-Man Moleskin:

Honorable mentions for my favorite stations: The Field (duh); the hill between the Flag and the upper baseball fields; the upper lot; the playground and the playground pavilion; and the hill between the field and the flag. Maybe we’ll hit all those on the next Magical Mystery Tour…

Seriously though…whoever was grunting during that last bit of abs is a comedic legend. Or they’re stuck in middle school. Or…we ran 2.5 miles with some crazy pain stations, and it was just really poorly timed exertion. Whatever it was, the ab-work was doubled with the amount of laughing going on.

I loved being out there with you guys this morning! SYITG