Golf…Except Worse
AO: Gladiator
When: 04/19/2022
QIC: Scratch-Off
PAX (13): Black Box, Devito, DREAMER, Ironhead, MillerTime, Moonshine, Scratch-Off, shiner, Spandex, Speedo, vertigo, Zohan, Brownie
Preamble:
Hi folks! YHC here, back from a month away except that one other time that Dreamer and I almost bailed on the prerun for WaHo… Last week, I was down in HHI with the Lowcountry HIMs right in between watching the Masters (on TV) and the Heritage (in person). I also got to play some golf of my own for the first time as a father of 2. For those wondering…despite my performance this morning, I’ve still got it!
So, this BD was inspired by a fun week of watching and emulating idiots whack tiny white balls with insanely overpriced sticks.
It was also inspired by a workout I did with the aforementioned Lowcountry boys.
It wasn’t inspired. It was ripped off directly.
We literally did the same workout last Tuesday at F3 Yacht Club.
Warm-O-Rama:
The disclaimer, unlike this BackBlast, was succinct.
We moseyed by a curious setup of props to the circle at midfield. Warmup was the following in no particular order, and with 80% accuracy.
- SSH
- Toy soldiers
- Hillbillies
- Squats
- World’s Greatest Stretch
- Burpees
- Moroccan Night Clubs
Head over to the baseline.
The Thang:
Golf. We played golf. Well, a form of golf, at least. The props mentioned above were two storage bins and a paint bucket all propped at an angle about 5 yards off the baseline. At the baseline were 3 sets of wedges and golf balls. Those represented “holes”. The goal was to play 18 holes, one shot at a time, in 40 minutes.
The catch is that after each attempt-or playing each hole-the PAX ran 140 yards and do an exercise once back at the baseline. If the PAX made the shot, he only had to do half the reps of the exercise. 3 holes represented a round, and we took a break at the end of each round. And by “taking a break” I mean that we practiced our chipping…with penalty of 5 burpees if we missed.
Round 1 (again 3 holes/3 sets of reps/run 3 times): 50 SSH (25 if you make the shot)
Round 2: Mountain Climbers, same
Round 3: LBCs
Round 4: Mercans
Round 5: Squats.
We didn’t make it through 6 rounds or 18 holes, but 15 is enough to post your score to GHIN. And, we should all post because that’ll be great to pad the handicap for summer golf season.
COT:
We have a 5k this Saturday and convergence on 5/7.
Prayers for Black Box: son’s hand and mourning a loss of a loved one by suicide.
Naked-Man Moleskin:
They say that showing up is 80% of success, so it’s great to know that heading into Finals season, I’m sitting on a 20% in this class. It was really really good to be back. I thought this was a super-fun workout to bring back. Even though our performance was pretty abysmal, we can rest assured that we were no worse than a group of guys that live on an island with 28 golf courses. So we have that going for us.
Also, that 80% quote is attributed to Woody Allen. I can 100% recommend to not be like Woody Allen.